multiple personalities

I strongly believe that the very nature of human beings is a contradictory one, and want to focus on the human psyché here. In my opinion the reason we sometimes have problems deciding – emotionally, or rationally – is that we encompass different personality aspects, dreams and desires; and they may be conflicting or even contrary from time to time.

The little boy wants to buy a new tool, because it’s flashy and big and it will be a lot of fun to drill more wholes in walls; the rational, maybe even greedy mature responds that there are already two of these tools at home; and another one – maybe the romantic? – adds that in order to save up money for the plane ticket to visit the loved one, we should seriously not spend money on useless tools.

We all catch ourselves checking if the door is locked twice – very rarely maybe, but everybody does it – or if we put out the oven. Obsessive-compulsive? No, because we do it seldom. It is a very weak part of us, and only if it dominates the others it is considered a psychological disorder.

We can be brave and afraid, egoistic and altruistic, schizoid and outgoing. In my world, we are everything at the same time, we have everything at the same time. We encompass, we contain, we are different personae in one mind. Clearly we have tendencies – some people are more extroverted, others more introverted – but even the boldest person can feel fear.

This may sound rather trite, but is a very important part of the way I see human beings. I learned it from listening to a great clinical psychologist and lecturer in Munich, who told us about working with patients with Multiple Personality Disorder*. The major difference between this clinical disorder and healthy subjects (read: us) is that these different aspects are less pronounced and more integrated.

We do have multiple personalities, just without disorder. Deciding will in most cases be a compromise which we usually are not aware of. Try to make yourself aware of the internal monologues that are going on inside of you, listen to the barter, quarrel and bargaining. It is an interesting world inside of us, one we tend to ignore completely, one most people are not aware of.

Think, feel and say contrary things. In my world, contradictions are usually the purest and most honest truths.

(thanks to M.M. for all the inspiration)

* Multiple Personality Disorder is not a proper scientific term, psychologists call it Dissociative Personality Disorder, which classifies as dissociative disorder (like dissociative amnesia or fugue), not personality disorder.
Personalitiy disorders are extremely stable, most dissociative disorders have a quite clear onset (in some cases trauma induced), and can usually be treated (unlike personality disorders, for which – oversimplifying a bit – psychoeducation is basically all you can do).